Deesha PhilyawThe Secret Lives of Church Ladies

I’ve sat on this book for years, at this point! But I did enjoy it. The different stories and takes on situations was a good touch. I liked the life lessons, stories of relationships, and the relations to church ladies and what is expected of them. There were a few stories that I enjoyed more than others but overall they all seemed to have a strong message and I respect that. Overall, really good read.

Deesah Philyaw’s The Secret Lives of Church Ladies won the prestigious Story Award for 2020, and this collection is well deserving of that accolade. The first story, Eula, sets the tone for the whole book, with its brief, heartbreaking look at two women who have been best friends “for more than half their lives”, but also lovers. While the narrator Caroletta, wants more from her friend than just the physical, Eula wants to be “normal” and hasn’t stopped looking for a husband and encouraging Caroletta to do the same. Eula is very religious, and she pushes hard against the idea that they can be anything more than they are. Caroletta, who is more ambivalent about her faith, continues to seduce and push Eula. As this very short story ends, Eula admits that she’s scared. Caroletta, acknowledging her fears, begins yet another physical interaction, and the story ends on this ambiguous note. Will there be a change? Or will Eula continue to search for the perfect husband?Many of the stories are likes the first, with characters pitting their faith against their desires. And these stories also pit women against other women. In Peach Cobbler a teenage girl finds herself tutoring the son of the preacher her mother has been having an affair with for years, and find herself in a position of choosing her own path or her mother’s (another story, Instruction For Married Christian Husbands, suggests that she ends up like her mother, but with more perceived agency) In Jael, the titular character is disgusted when her friend begins to sleep with an older man, but she soon finds herself alone with him, and also makes a surprising choice.There’s hope in some of the stories too. In How to Make Love to a Physicist, a woman’s distaste of her own body hinders her ability to be in a relationship with a seemingly good guy, but her psychiatrists helps her along. When Eddie Levert Comes is a poignant look at desire and memory, as a woman tries to find love while caring for her mother, who has dementia but wakes every morning believing her crush as a young woman is coming to see her.These are all just amazing stories, very human and deep in their meaning, and creative in their various forms. Well done.

Enjoyed reading this book and I also have the audible version. There were times I found myself laughing out loud. I found it a bit difficult following the story but overall a good read. I would recommend this book.

This was an excellent read.I wish there were more of these portrayals of realistic women and their sexuality when I was younger. I also appreciated that, in many of the stories were light-hearted or bittersweet. I'm a bit tired of books about miserable people suffering.I think that the author is at her best when she portrays characters who she probably relates to more. Though the characters in the book are many ages, the most relatable came of age in the 80s. They are mostly defining their boundaries, especially in terms of their sexuality and their relationships with their mothers. When the author portrays women from older generations, the inner life that she describes is less nuanced, more what could be deduced from what they say rather than what could be imagined of their secret thoughts.My favorite chapters were dear sister, peach cobbler, how to make love to a physicist, and instructions for married christian husbands. All of the stories had memorable characters and I'm sure that they'll stay with me for many years.A lot of ppl like Jael. I read it twice (once after I reviewed the context of the scripture quoted at the end. I believe that atory) It's a fascinating and nuanced story. It made me wish that I had read it as part of a book club bc it left me with questions and points to discuss. All of that said, it also fell a bit flat for me. The other stories describe actions, both good and evil, that are common enough to be mundane, and I think that's a real strength of the book. In Jael, the characters are less like ppl I know. One, or possibly two, of the actions in that story are behaviors by teen girls that I never heard mention of in my 10 years of working at a crisis center (I've seen a lot of evil, though I'm sure I haven't seen everything). It's a compelling story, but not as satisfyingly real as the others.I appreciated that a lot of the stories ended with semicolons rather than periods. If the author ever wants to tell us what happened next in their lives, I'd love to find out (and I was so relieved to meet one character for a second time towards the end).

I can’t be the only one who feels like she can write a pt 2 and just follow up each story where she left off. I can across this book randomly and it was so worth the read!

Page turner!! A great lazy Sunday read. Enjoyable from beginning to end.Lots of memorable characters. #shorts. #stories. Wishing I had bought a hard copy for my library.

The first two stories were unexpected (not sure what I expected really), I thought I was supposed to be reading about church ladiesThe writing in this book is beautiful. I kept stopping to smile at the pages and appreciate the words. One of the chapters is a long letter from a sister to another while another is a list of instructions. Each different writing style is refreshing.My favourite chapter was How to Love a Physicist, a story of pure, patient love and self discovery.The chapter that made me laugh the most was Instruction for Married Christian Husbands.As a people watcher, I love reading about different characters. In this book we meet and fall in love (or hate) with all sorts of characters from the very patient Physicist called Eric, the strong willed Jael and her grandma, randy men who get pepper sauce in their drinks and Jamie who had much more than that, peach cobbler making mistresses and cheating pastors.Themes explored in this book include grief and different ways of dealing with it, love (giving and accepting it), identity, dysfunctional families, sexuality and acceptance, infidelity and caring for sick parents.I thoroughly enjoyed this book, read both the physical copy and listened to the audio book.

A beautifully crafted collection of short stories, layered with an irresistible southern wit, stark humour and a messy realness that just felt so damn sexy.In The Secret Lives of Church Ladies, no secrets are left untold as Deesha Philyaw’s unearths the distinct, deep rooted hunger for freedom, passion, lust and desire that drives each of her characters, which in turn, exposes a rich and insightful exploration into religion, womanhood, sexuality, infidelity, power, sexism and so much more.For such a quick, mesmerising read, Deesha Philyaw will have you begging for more.

Really enjoyed the characters in this collection. All of them very distinct in stories that touch on several themes like finding love, acceptance, friendship. All of them with some connection to the church or religion but that is just one facet of their lifes and there is so much depth in these characters that compels you to read the entire collection in no time.

Not being the target audience for this book I still found it surprising good. Short stories.

Excellent read. A very thought provoking mix of experiences influenced by a variety of lifestyles, traditions and religious beliefs. Recommend.