Feel the Fear . . . and Do It Anyway Paperback – December 26, 2006

I listen to books on my kindle (I turn on "text to speak") as I get ready in the morning for work. I've listened to this book twice now. I swear, I will probably listen to it countless more times. It's amazing how powerful this book is for me. I've struggled with depression most of my life, I am currently going through a divorce, & living alone for the first time in my life. I was, & at times I still feel like a lost puppy...I had a pretty unique life, I lived with my mother, we moved a lot, I was sexually abused by one of very few male figures in my life...I never had many friends (we moved too much for me to get close to people), & my mother was emotionally unavailable. To this day she is not emotionally available, but I accept her as she is, & that took years to learn how to do...the point of me putting my life story out there is because no one in my life cared about me, in any way shape or form. My mom couldn't wait for me to get married, she just about signed for me to marry my then 21 year old boyfriend when I was 15, because I think she could not wait to get rid of me, her "burden" off of her chest. So, when I did finally get married a few years ago, I thought my life's mission was accomplished, I was married, that was what I was supposed to do in my life, if I ever wanted my mother to be proud of me...I was never around anyone in my life that told me "feel the fear, & do it anyway", no one said "you can do this, keep going forward"...I didn't have that. I feel like I was raising myself, I raised myself emotionally, I gave myself pep-talks to be able to make it through new schools a few new ones every year, stomach aches of worry when my mom would be freaking out, concerned about bills or whatever else she had going on in her life... Severe neglect, that's what I'd say my life was. I had maybe 2 friends through my entire school career, real friends, that is. And, we moved so much, I never even kept in touch. Anyway, the point is, that when you grow up without someone there telling you that you can do whatever you want, you can be whatever you want, you are great, you are amazing, even amazing people get scared...you don't assume those things. I have had irrational fears, sooooooooooooo many, I was scared of the dark, scared of Michael Myers (as if this fictional character was going to come after me...seriously, I was afraid he was, I know it probably sounds so ridiculous to the average person, but I've been to therapy, these fears come from trauma & basically the things I went through growing up)...sometimes I never thought I'd be able to get past all of the fears that crippled me. I've been wanting to go back to school, & get my degree, but school was very hard for me, I am anti-social, & going to school was traumatizing in itself for me, with all that was going on in the background of my life, school was just as torturous to me...I never had any friends, I wasn't the cool kid, I ate lunch alone a lot...it was awful.I signed up to go to school a few years ago, I made it to the parking lot that first day, burst into tears...turned around & went home...cried for hours, nearly committed suicide...these feelings run very deep, & it's hard to move forward when there is so many painful memories of the past.Anyway, with this book, I feel like I'm very close to being able to have the courage to go back. I think a few more times of listening to this book, & I'll actually be able to do it. But overall, this book makes me less afraid of life. That again is probably not what most people want this book for, but me not being afraid of life, that is monumental, I was afraid that I was not a real person/woman without being married or a wife, the one thing I'd idolized my whole life (I was taught to), to be married. I survived, & everyday is a new day & journey, & you never know where life might take you. I feel great when I read this book, I'll keep reading, whenever I have something I want to achieve, I will read it again - this is a timeless book, & I'm thankful I found it.

This book was recommended to me by a co-worker. And it has turned out to be the best thing ever if you need a reminder or some inspiration this is the book for you!Plus call me crazy, but it smells good too! And that's a hard thing to do for amazon. 😅

I'm no fan of self-help books, of which this (I suppose) is a specimen. That said, Dr. Jeffers is a common-sense counselor with some good ideas. Even her less-than-good ideas may spur you to devise better ones of your own. Its biggest strength is the high value it places on positivity, of which, in our deeply cynical and angry age, we are in greater need with every passing month (week? day?).

Book is in great shape. Shipped and delivered fast! Not a scratch on the cover.

Original.

I have read many self help books and they have been great, but the author of this book does a great job making the content clear and easy for the reader to understand. Susan Jeffers does a great job motivating the reader to face their fears no matter what it is in order to grow in life. I had to buy a hard copy of this book to always have with me.

Great book! Recommend. Feel the fear and do it anyway is going to be my favorite phrase from now on.

Man. How do you rate a book that steadily devolves from five stars down to one star?This starts out as a five star book. The first few chapters of this book have probably altered my world view permanently. Here's the gist of what really hit home for me:At the heart of every fear we have is one single fear: "I can't handle it." This is an absolute revelation, at least to me, because it means that there is one reliable (though still not easy) formula to be used for overcoming fear: convince yourself that you can handle it.She goes on to explain that the more we do things we're afraid of, thus proving to ourselves that we CAN handle danger, uncertainty, loss, loneliness, etc., the more we can feel confident that we will be able to handle similar experiences in the future. In other words, facing our fears is something we can practice and get better at, even if we can never completely obliterate fear from our lives.She goes on to talk about decision making. Decision making often induces fear because we're scared that if we make the wrong decision it can have disastrous consequences. She suggests that instead of thinking of a decision in terms of a "right choice" and a "wrong choice," we think of them simply as different choices, and that with the right attitude, we can experience growth and fulfillment in our lives regardless of which choice we make. She points out how even in horrible circumstances (losing a job, being diagnosed with cancer, losing a loved one), we are given tremendous opportunities to experience personal growth, and it gives us confidence to emerge triumphant from difficult circumstances.All great, great advice that I will definitely take to heart. She then goes on to talk about positive affirmations, achieving balance in life, choosing to love those who we feel have wronged us. This is where the book started to take a turn for the worse. I actually agreed with a lot of what she was saying. I don't deny that it's good to surround yourself with supportive people. I agree that it's good to identify goals in our lives and work towards them. But ... read the summary of this book:"Are you afraid of making decisions . . . asking your boss for a raise . . . leaving an unfulfilling relationship . . . facing the future? Whatever your fear, here is your chance to push through it once and for all. In this enduring guide to self-empowerment, Dr. Susan Jeffers inspires us with dynamic techniques and profound concepts that have helped countless people grab hold of their fears and move forward with their lives." Around Chapter 3 (only 15% into the book!), Jeffers starts veering pretty far away from the subject of facing your fears. A book should not be marketed as "Learn to face your fears!" if the majority of the book is only tangentially related to that subject.And then there was chapter 11. Allow me to post an excerpt from chapter 11:"I believe that what all of us are really searching for is this divine essence within ourselves. When we are far from our Higher Self, we feel what Roberto Assagioli has so aptly called 'Divine Homesickness.' When you are feeling this sense of being lost, or off course, the thing to do to find your way home again is simply to use the rools that will align you with your Higher Self--and thus allow the good feelings to flow once again." This is the point at which, in my mind, the book became a one star book.In summary, I think this book idea would have made an excellent essay or pamphlet. The first two chapters were invaluable. The rest were filler.